hmmm...

ha... well, i've gone for a while without writing in here, and i'm pretty dang sure no one is reading this, so i don't really care... i guess i can just use it as whatever i want... which is.... who really knows
recently a lot has been going on in my life, a lot about regret and fears for future, some are very stupid and minute in the specrtum of life, but tohers are whether or not i will disappoint myself and others, which shouldn't really matter, because if it is glorifying to God, i should rejoice in that, but thats really hard, especially when one fails, idk... something to thin k about i guess, and then there is wanting to have a moment with God that i can call myown, i mean i love youth gruops and retreats and camps but to be able to sti in a room alone w/ith God and just dwell in his presence and not worry and not fret and all that, i mean i've ome close, i will probably never get as close until the day i die and i am home, but for now, i want to exceed the limits of waht god and i can do together, how close our friendship will come.... i can only imagine, truly...
i'm really excited about alot of things in my life too, God has blessed me with so much, and i can only praise him so much, and i want to continue to always praise him even when i get caught up in the its all about me attitude, which it greatly is not... i am slowly realizing howmuch God has given me, whether singing , or family, or friends, or logic, or health, theres so much... i 'm just afraid that people will think that its all me and that they will get so caught up in that and then i will and i just hope i never do, because thats sick and disgusting ... i don't know, maybe thats a nother lesson i must go through, man those are hard... whether its completely screwing up a friendship or treating others with disrespect when i don't know them, i don't know, i've learned lots, and i hope that i remember them,
well on a lighter note we had the firest rehearsal of esprit de corps today, and it was spectacular, it was fun and i can only wait for the next on, im so excited, i don't know how to express it! i haven't decided yet whether or not i want to try out for the drama and solo auditions, i truly do, but i dont know if thats where God wants me, idk hopefully he'll make that a little more clear than mud, haha

well, i guess i've written enough for another 6 months, haha
God bless,
Kelsey Nicole Ann Ankerson (sr. haha)